◊◊◊◊◊◊◊ Swami Saranam ◊◊◊◊◊◊◊

The following are few useful FAQs for Sabarimala Pilgrimage – all these answers not mine; Few of them are from my experience, Most of it collected from various publications in Malayalam, I am trying do a translation. BIG thank you to Sabarimala priest Sri. Kandararu Rajeevar, who has published an article in Malayalam newspaper few years ago – most of the FAQs are based on that article.

There are few stages in Sabarimala Pilgrimage, to start with Mala Dhaaranam (start of Vrutham), Mandala Vrutham,  Kettunira (Preparation of Irumudi), Journey to Sabarimala,  Mala kayattam (trekking to Sannidanam), Darshanam.

FAQs are categorized into these stages – Starting with Mala Dhaaranam;

1.    What is the correct day to perform “Mala Dhaaranam”?

Malayalam Month “Vrishchikam” first (17.11.2014 for this year) the most auspicious day to perform “Mala Dhaaranam”. If you missed this date perform it on any of the following Saturdays OR next Malayalam Nakshatram “Uthram”. Do not perform the same on your Birth Star Day.

2.    What are the pre-requisites and preparations to be performed before “Mala Dharanam”?

Day before “Mala Dhaaranam” Clean the house and surroundings. Clean the pooja room and install one photo of Appayya swami. Wash and dry all the cloths that are planned to wear during “Vritha”. If you can sprinkle “Punyaham” on the cloths that is the best. If not possible – take clean water in a vessel, chant the following sloka and sprinkle the water on the cloths

“Gange Cha Yamune Chaiva

Godavari   Sarawathi,

Narmathe Sindhu,

Kaveri Jalaesmin Sannidhim Kuru”

You must start “Vrutha” one day before “Mala Dhaaranam”

3.    What type of Mala is ideal for Dhaaranam?

Ayyappaswami locate (Mudra) must be added to the mala; Mala must be made from either of Thulsi, Chandan or Rudraksha.

4.    Where to perform Mala Dhaaranam?

It must be performed at a temple premise. To be blessed by a Guruswami or the temple priest.

5.    How to perform Mala Dhaaranam?

Sharanavili must be done in loud voice while Mala is put on. If received from Guruswami, Mudradhyanam must be chanted.

6.    What is Mudradhynam?

This is the process of in-holding ayyappa swami into the devotee’s body and soul. An ayyappa devote who has got his Mala Dhaaranam done will be equal to Ayyappaswami till he completes his pilgrimage. That is the reason why they are called ayyappa or swami after mala Dhaaranam.

Mudradhyanam goes like below – Guruswami has to chant first and devotees to repeat the same, before performing mala Dharanam.

Njanamudram Shasthramudram

Gurumudram Namam-ahyam

Vanamudram Shuddhamudram

Rudramudram Namam-ahyam

Shanthamudram Satyamudram

Vruthamudram Namam-ahyam

Sabari-aashrama sathyenah

Mudram-padu Sadapi-Mehm

Gurudhakshinayahm Poorvam

Thasyah-anugraha karanneham

Saranagatha mudraghyam

Tha-mudram dharayam-ahyam

Sabariyachala-mudrayeham

Samasthuphyam Namo-Namaha

7.    What to be performed next after Mala Dharanam?

If the rituals are performed by temple priest, Dhakshina to be given to the priest; If its done by Guruswami, get blessings from him by touching his feet. Pray to Lord Ayyappa to forgive all the Sins committed so far “Manasa Vacha Karmana”.

                                                          [TO BE CONTINUED]

Trivandrum to be renamed as Trivand – without the RUM - BAR-barring by Kerala GOVT.

Yes – Trivandrum the capital city of Kerala will go under another name change yet again on tomorrow (12^th Sept 2014) due to removal of RUM from its name and will be called as Trivand hence forth. Kerala govt has announced that the BARs (Kerala version of Bangalore Pubs if you like to call it that way) will be closed down on 12^th sept onwards in the state. Foreign liquor will be available either in 5* hotels OR in government civil supplies outlets. This BAR-bar-i-an decision has been made by the Ooman Chandy  govt and will be implemented on 12^th.

Does this stop Chetta’s drinking?  Does Chalakkudy and Karunagapalli now renamed to Chalakudiyilla or Karuna. Will they be withdrawing from their ever famous traditional game of drinking in Onam/Christmas season. Will we get to see news that Chalakuddy has won in ‘Vadam vali(tug of war)’ OR ‘Chakkil Chattam (sack race)’in  this Onam season. Is this what we want?

Kerala, which comes second in per capita consumption of liquor after Punjab, gets a tax revenue of roughly Rs 8,500 crore annually — 22 per cent of the total tax revenue —from the sale of Indian Made Foreign Liquor. The per capita consumption in Kerala is around seven litre per year while the national average is only 2.5 litre.

When we talk about call barring in telecom world, we do have another option called call divert. Once the BARs will be barred – where will the nature’s call for many of the ‘Ayyappa Baiju’s’ in Kerala will be diverted to? Yeah – toddy shops are still ON in the god’s own land. Not sure if Govt has done any capacity estimation here – will the toddy shops be able to consume all the Chetta’s who will left barless from 12^th. Can Chettas afford 5* liquor? Will all the Chettas OK to stand in queue in the civil supplies outlets? KSBC outlets will be available only 297 days in a year henceforth – what is govt answer for the remaining 68 days?  

After this announcement, Kerala matrimonial websites and agencies are observing a great demand of brides whose father are serving or retired from Defense.

Intension of the govt is reducing alcohol consumption in Kerala households to improve the social situation of the community; By this move, is it going to reduce? Yes – to some extend – yes; definitely yes.

Is it good to reduce alcohol consumption? Doctor’s practicing in Kerala claims ‘Nov/Dec/Jan’ is off season for them as patients count is less. Less of alcohol consumption during these months due to Sabarimala season – which is hinting that reducing consumption, is good.

This monk (old monk rum) has made lot of Chettas to sell their Maruthis, if not Ferraris. Some of the high class Chettas (but still cannot afford Le-meridian liquor) are asking their cousins coming from neighboring to state to bring a bottle – who otherwise would have been sitting in some BARs for their drinking needs. This class is hesitated to stand in the long queues of KSBC outlets. This way – yes it is reducing.

Punarjani-2030 is the program that govt is offering to support to the rehabilitation of employees in the bars and hotels. I have no clue why is it called 2030; are they going to start in 2030 OR are they going to finish it by 2030 – no idea. These employees are the ones who will get orphaned due to this change. Will they be really rehabilitated? Similar BAN on arrack was implemented by Antony govt and 1996 and there was a promise to rehabilitate the ‘arrack outlet’ employees.  The below story is of real life incident of a person very close to me, who got really affected by arrack ban 1996.

Saabu (name changed) was manager for one of the arrack outlet in Trivandrum during this time. He had a king like life when he was at that post. I can still remember the Sundays when he returns to home for his weekly offs. There is dialogue from ‘Mohanlal’ in Ravanaprabhu movie about Madhupal’s character in the movie. Karthikeyan has got him a job in one of his friend’s distillery and being around alcohol and seeing its manufacturing process Hari (Madhupal’s charactor) does not drink. I guess this is possible only in movies. In our case of Sabu Annan, being around alcohol all the time it is natural tendency to consume some and he was consuming in large quantities and hence shrinking his liver. 96 ban on arrack shattered him literally and brought him to the road. Govt has given some money as compensation after two years, using which he has started many business ventures, but none of them sustained. Those are all negativities about the change and some or many of the BAR employees that are going to face after 12^th. But there is a BIG gain for him and his family because of this change – he was alive for longer period of time on the mother earth. He could complete all the paternal duties. He could see his grandchildren before he passed away 2 year back. If was continuing in the arrack outlet for more time probably he would not have done all those. For me it is a BIG positivity that ‘this change’ can bring. If at least few of the BAR employees manage to see their grandchildren then it is a right move.

       Yours Truly,

       Aary 

Experiences with Appreciation

Experiences with Appreciation

‘Appreciation’ – dictionary.com meaning of this word is ‘the act of estimating the qualities of things and giving them their proper value’. In simple terms recognizing some ones effort. It starts with a simple ‘thank you’ and ends anywhere. When we overdo it can be called as pampering, which is dangerous. The ideal situation for the same to find the ‘median’ and this point differs in different contexts. It varies from person to person, situation to situation. I have jot down some situation where I had experienced ‘Appreciation’. I have not taken any names here – but many of you find yourself in one of the characters mentioned – it is not coincidence it is purely natural.

Keep it up.

Few months back incident, my 6 year old son got an appreciation from his drawing teacher. Apparently she told him ‘Very good and Keep it up’ and patted on his back. After that day his drawing book is kept on the top most slots in his book shelf. He is really keeping it up. Realizing the same I tried to explain him – but he never gets it. But it motivated him do more drawing so the purpose of appreciation is met.

It is my job.

It was my last day in Netherland office in one of my many site visits, my on-shore director was about to leave from office. He walked up to me and said ‘thank you’ and shook my hands. It was like a surprise to me and I asked ‘for what’? He said ‘I would like to thank you for all the good work that you have done here’. I said ‘fine, welcome – I have not done anything above my job description; you do not need to thank me for doing my job’. He then said ‘It is my job description – that says I have to thank you’. Later, I went back to HR portal and checked, if at all it is there in the job description of a person at his level. It was not there. Means as we grow and mature, we only add as ‘Job Description’ to appreciate people – such a nice thing.

Limassol wine festival.

It was one of those times, where I was preparing kids to perform ‘Ramayana’ on the stage which was part of Diwali celebrations at office. During the same time Cultural club has arranged some inter-platform sports events as well. It was like 0800PM in the evening when I returned to my desk after the rehearsal for the kids; then my colleague also arrived after his sport event. He was talking about how went ahead and won the one-minute performance. To our surprise, there appeared one of our directors from the delivery function; she hands over one wine bottles and a ‘thank you note’ to both of us. We both stood up to understand the situation. Then she shook hands with us and says ‘Thank you so much for putting lots of effort – I know that is it is little late now; you guys are still working late – this is token of appreciation for the hard work put’. We both did not utter a single word. It was meant for people working late, but since we both happened to be there - we became victim of that real gesture of appreciation.

The young man in the Old Madras Road.

I see one traffic cop every day morning, near to our office managing the traffic situation in the junction. This guy has not got a transfer or change of his location for past few years. I see him every day managing the traffic situation irrespective of the weather conditions. One bright summer day (it was really hot that day), I was walking towards a bank work near to this junction and realized how difficult is to be out there in sun in such a weather and pollution condition. This gentle man (traffic cop), he is still there managing the situation at ease. While returning back from bank, I walked to him and shook his hands and said ‘thank you so much, sir – you are doing a wonderful job by managing the traffic’. He looked at me as if I am not from this planet. I don’t even know if he understood what I am trying to say. I think he does a thankless job and none appreciates him. He gave me a blunt puzzled look without any expression and asked me move away as he has his work to do.

We all must learn to appreciate and make it habit, its true both in professional as well as personal life. Appreciation motivates people to do more than they can actually deliver. Now than you all for reading this till here – really appreciated.

Yours truly,

Aary 

Three Mothers - Where do you want to see your Parents/Yourself in their/your old age?

Three Mothers – please try to answer the question at the end to yourself, after reading all 3 stories

Agnetha

It was in 1960’s when Achilles Kleanthis, a cottage cheese producer/merchant of Attica found his goddess in the down valley of Mount Aegaleo. Yes Agnetha was no less than any Greek goddess in her 20s when Achilles met her for the first time. Though Agnetha was born to a grapes farmer did not had any great gene-ology for claim, Achilles decided to marry her and he gave a diamond necklace on her wedding day. She did all that for Achilles just like his queen on his responsibilities front, they had travelled across the globe, enjoyed all the good things in life. She had 5 children from Achilles; 3 daughters and 2 sons; Time moved on, world around her changed; Achilles had a bad habit of spending money on betting in horse race; in the due course, he has lost all his money and business through this. His eldest son followed his father’s path and died in an accident while learning horse riding. Whatever money and assets left with him, he has divided and given to his children in his will. He expected his children to take care of their mother and hence didn’t keep anything for her. Agnetha is now in her old age, is taken care by her youngest daughter Alena. Alena has got her on limitations to help. She needs to do it based on what her husband dictates; she has got ‘do and don’ts’ written. Agnetha has nothing with her except a diamond necklace, probably is the only reason Alena’s husband allows her to live in their house. Agnetha has approached her other daughters several times – but they have their own reasons for not keeping her with them. Some of them are real genuine reasons. Here is a Greek mother (once a lived like a queen), counting her days, living like a servant in her own daughter’s house.

Laxmi

While Agnetha was feeding cattle in the valley of Mount Aegaleo, Laxmi was performing here teaching duty in the small village of Chidambaram in the southern state of India. Her husband Kuppuswamy was a temple priest and a servant of lord Vishnu. They live in their ancestor’s house inherited from Swamy’s father. They had two children, Thangam and Mohan. Thangam got married to Raja, who works in Central reserve Police and lives in the north. Mohan who was very good at his studies, completed his management studies from IIM Bangalore and now works for a banking giant in the united states. Swamy decided to give his house to Mohan; this is when Mohan suggested building a new house. Swamy sold his old house to raise some capital to help Mohan to buy some land for their new house. Laxmi and Swamy always wanted Mohan to get married to her brother’s daughter Meenakshi. Their dream got shattered when Mohan arrived home from US with Karla, his Danish wife. Swamy could not bear it and asked him to leave the home. Mohan felt insulted and left the home. That is last when he visited his India home. He lives in Florida with his Danish wife and son Varun. After this incident, Mohan stopped interacting with his Parents even on the phone. The house construction was left half way and Mohan has now no interest to continue or return back to India. During construction phase itself, Swamy and Laxmi had move into the new half-done house. The old couple expected time will cure the things and they were waiting for his son to return. Swamy once wrote a letter to his son that they are ready to accept Karla, for this which they never got a reply. Swamy was not sure if Mohan intentionally not replied or if the letter reached him or not. In the due course, Swamy passed away left Laxmi in the half constructed house. She is now 73 years lives alone in this house, gets a small pension from the temple trust for all Swamy’s good service. Each and every corner of the house you see misery and poverty. The only help Laxmi has the childhood friend of her living nearby.

Here is an Indian Mother, who has given nothing other than love to their children in her entire life; but has nobody to take care of in her old age; she is not living, she just exists.

Rabeeha

Latakia is a small city in the western cost of Syria that touches the Mediterranean. Ahamed is a poor middle class fisherman lived in the downtown. He goes out to the sea to catches fishes and sells in local market for living. His house and the small manual boat are the only assets that Ahamed had. In spite of having a large family (7 children, wife, mother and mother in law), he lived very happily with whatever earning that he had. He always lived for a day, whatever he earned in a day, get spend on the family and next day 0400 AM is again a new day. Almighty was always kind to him, and gave him good catch of fish on all days. In this house there were two mothers, his mother Rabeeha and his mother in law Haseena. If you discount her ‘night blindness’, Rabeeha was very healthy and enthusiastic lady. She used to do all house hold work, took care of all the children of Ahamed. Haseena (Ahamed’s mother-in-law) was bed ridden for a long period of 17 years till she passed away 2 years back. She will be always grateful and thankful to Rabeeha as she has done all the needful in these seventeen years of her helplessness. It was yesterday evening that Ejaz (Ahemed’s eldest son) has got a call from his mother, saying that Rabeeha has passed away. Ejaz was surprised to hear that he was not asked to come back to Syria to do the last rituals. There was always a friction between Rabeeha and his mother; he considered it a usual saas-bahu issue – but he never knew that the problem is so deep that he was not even called for before they buried his grandmother.

Ejaz questioned his mother for reasoning – the story that his mother told was really surprising. “Son, at no doubt she was your grandmother and also she is not your grandmother, which requires you here for the last rituals. You can fly down from Dubai as soon as you can if you wish so”. Ejaz was puzzled to hear this. His mother continued the story. “Rabeeha is not your real grandmother; your father is not born for her. The story goes like this, some years back, when you very small child – one day while your father was winding up his fish stall and leaving the market in the afternoon, he could see a lady sitting in a corner and crying. She was whispering ‘Ahamed’, ‘Ahamed’. Ahamed approached to see that its Rabeeha sitting there and crying, He asked the matter – She replied that her son has left her in the Market and went to get some water for her and she was waiting for him for a long time. Now she does not know how to go back to home nor does she had any address or land marks; All she know is the name of her son ‘Ahamed’. It was little late in the evening and was raining; Ahamed found out that she is blind as well. Your father thought ‘Bring her to home’ is the right thing to do in that evening. We did all honest efforts to find her real son Ahamed, but could not, and thus she became part of our family”. Ejaz was overturned with mixed emotions; could not say anything back. He was literally in tears. He said “Ammi, I am flying tonight, just to meet my father, the biggest heart on the earth”. He has taken care of a mother for 2 decades, who is none to him, in this new era where people are not taking care of their own parents.

Having read all three stories, which mother/father you want to be in your old age?  OR rather in which of the above scenario you want to see your parents?

Decision and Actions are both yours, I am just a messenger. My answers to above question is 'I should do all that to my parents, which i want my children to do for me in my old age'.

Yours Truly,

Aary

Why India Inc. not producing a google or an apple?

Why India Inc. not producing a google or an apple?

Having spent more than a decade, in software industry, this question always comes to my mind. I was in search of answers? Don’t know what I am putting down is right or left – but let me;

Why youngsters lands in IT industry in India?

          In the late 90s there was really an IT boom in India; The companies in the west started exploring the possibilities of computer technology and they realized that the skills set in their own land is costly when compared to that in India. Indian organizations (with very strong support from the govt.) fished that plentifulness big time to build their fortune. In order to work in IT all you need is logical thinking (which most of us have) and aptitude. Even if I have done Mechanical or Civil engineering, I will land in IT as there are a plenty if high paying jobs and less of people having those skills. It is a status symbol back home. ‘My son works in IT’ has become a feeling. Initially many said it is GOLF (Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden) game; over the period of time that is also proven otherwise. The strong affinity for IT is not seen these days with youngsters, though it is not fully died out. It is a universal behavior that everyone wants their children to excel in the same profession like the parents. I don’t think that this is true for IT folks.

Contribution from Society

I believe an Individual’s shape up happens through 3 major influences, ‘Inherited Genetically’, ‘Family and Brought up’ and lastly ‘Society’. Our echo system looks at school drop-out as bad guy image. India's emphasis on engineering, medical schools, and studies makes it difficult for a teenager to pursue a business venture which is his/her passion; It takes extreme guts to go against the grain and societal pressures to pursue a business opportunity without a steady income;

If Bill Gates was born in India, he would not have become owner of Microsoft. On 8^th grade he bunked his maths class to visit computer lab to learn BASIC programming and he ended up in writing his first game of tic-tac-toe in Teletype Model 33 ASR terminal. Even if this happens today in India, our system would be concentrating more on the calling his parents questioning about his bunking of Maths class and he would have given a warning of expelling from school – a literal ‘nip in bud’; whereas Gates has done this in late 60s.

So called IT Giants in India

With all due respect to all the IT services organizations in India, Yes - you are doing a wonderful job by consuming all the lacks and lacks of software (or non-software) engineers produced by Indian engineering colleges’ year on year.  You are helping India Inc. in a BIG way in reducing un-employment in the country. Thank you for that. You are adding some contributions towards killing innovation in young minds.

Mind set for services organizations is to bill maximum head count to their customers in the west. They do create a frame work or ‘a confined environment of abstraction’ to perform computer programming. The services mindset does not care about individual’s aspirations; rather they ask them to fulfill all their aspirations within the boundary set by their customers. Few yeas back while I was talking to a support person in my outsourced team about how did he landed there; ‘Sir I wanted to do computer programming and hence I joined XYZ, but because I am from commerce background they put me in support’; this could be one of a case – but I am sure there are many cases like this. All these organizations take fresher’s in a bulk quantity to support their on-bench methodology, and spoiling their aspirations. They end up as a well-trained lion to do only ‘dance and drive’ within the boundary of the Circus ring.

Our brain design

When we talk about logical thinking – we are talking about ‘left brain usage’ and when we talk about creative arts or sports we are talking about ‘right brain usage’. Historically, we Indians had evolved as a left brained creatures. Take a simple example of ‘angry birds’, we all know the logic behind this is simple projectile motion physics; we all knew this so many years ago. But India does not own Angry Birds. Take another example ‘Talking Tom’ – logic very simple. Record and replay; for some reason we don’t get it to cash it.  West does.

Off late, I was talking to one of my friend who does coaching on the human behaviors across the globe and she told me one classic example; they have an exercise where participants needs to perform a role play of three locations (USA, AUS and India). While they conducted this in Mumbai what participants has done is – took 3 sheets of paper and wrote ‘New Jersey’, ‘Sydney and ‘Mumbai’ on the paper and paste on the wall to represent three places. This exactly the ‘left brained thinking’.

When they did this in Netherlands, what the participants have done is – instead of writing the place names – they drew picture of 3 clocks which they set 3 different time zones – more right brained.

When they did this in Brazil, what the participants have done is – instead of writing the place names or clocks – they drew picture of 3 monuments in the three countries to represent the locations. ‘Christ the Redeemer of Rio De Janeiro’, ‘Opera house  in Sydney’ and ‘ Agra’s Taj Mahal’ to be exact.  That is more and more right brained thinking.

By now (over a period of time) most of us become left brained; we can only think logically and hence we end up in programming and calculation related profession.

Recent past

India Inc. is seeing lots of entrepreneurship mushrooming all around in the recent past. This is a very good sign; you can read many of such stories if you subscribe to ‘yourstory.in’. I think environment is changing and it is supporting youngsters for creating our own apples and oranges. I really hope we outsource work to west in near future.

Yours truly,

Aary

Happy New Year to all the bloody mallus out there .........

All the bloody mallus out there – logically today is the happy mallu new year to you all. Today is 1^st of day of the Malayalam month of Chingam in the lunar year 1190. Chingam is month where festival of Kerala (Onam) is celebrated. Chingam falls in Aug-Sept in Gregorian calendar; probably one of the best time to Visit Kerala.

Most of us are not aware and not really care of this day; Vishu is considered as New Year by most of the north keraliets even if there is no year start on Vishu day in April. That’s fine we use coconut oil – we are different breed altogether.

I have a memory of Chingam 1^st from my school days. One of the child Stream of Ithikkara River used to flow in front of my house. Yes- it used to, where did this river gone now – I will come back with another post. Lets come back to the river part. The evening before Chingam 1^st, i.e. Last day of Karkidakam; Amma and neighboring aunties broom their houses in the evening and take all the dust and waste in a palla (a spathe of the areca-nut palm). After putting a handful of cooked rice, they light a lamp. Along with some flowers they place this in the river and let it go. We all children follow the group and sing the song as below. 

This is for welcoming Onam month to our households; the above lines literally translates to – let all the waste go out and Onam month please comes in.

      Another story related to this thing is about a friend of mine; this is the time we were in engineering college, this friend of mine was trying to 'pathavofy' a junior girl from Kerala. During an early stage of crush or infatuation, all you want is find opportunities to talk to her. 

Having the above childhood memory, I suggested him to call her and wish; after lots of trials and waiting to girls hostel number – finally we got her on the call. He smiled and wished ‘Puthuvatsara Ashamsakal, happy new year’. She was totally puzzled. She was from Malabar side and not really value Chingam 1^st as they believe Vishu as the New Year. This is nor April neither Jan, why is he wishing me New Year now. She failed to understand he just needs to wish, don’t really care of the New Year. 

But good, in some way or form it helped him building that relationship. I think I need to reveal his name. Yes Friends fame ‘Chackachamparambil Joy’. 

Walking in the moonlight, peeing in the Wardrobe; A serious case of Benjamin Button, a.k.a Nocturnal Enuresis and a simple solution

Walking in the moonlight, peeing in the Wardrobe  

         A serious case of Benjamin Button, a.k.a Nocturnal Enuresis and simple solution

Time 0930PM, me and my brother is watching something in the TV, Akku (younger son – 3 year old) is doing some mischief in front of us. Aary (elder one – 6 year old) is sleeping the sofa. Sandya is busy in closing down the kitchen.

Suddenly Aary get up, looks at us – I said ‘Hi’; He nodded his head, looks around. I have a wall mounted flat TV in the living room with wooden unit below the same to hold set-top-box, DVD player etc. Aary now closed his eyes, walked towards the TV. He opened the door of the wooden unit; we both are clueless what he is upto. I was thinking he is going to switch off the TV or something like that.

To our surprise he pulled his trouser down lift his little john and holds it in his hand; My brother who was sitting near to the TV unit, realized and screamed – I manage to take him in the same posture to the bathroom so that he could empty his bladder;

Aary (also Akku) have been bed wetting ever since they were off the diapers; whether you like it or not it is natural phase in bringing up your off springs and I know that if you have kids at this age you will also agree with me.

We have been telling them (yelling them) to wake up in the night and go to bathroom; they are able to do these days but not all the time. In fact taking extra nickers and keeping the bed side table is a ‘Business As Usual’ process at home before going to bed.

Yesterday night, I wake up hearing a BIG cry, lights were on. Aary standing and crying and his Amma is standing next to him and crying due to helplessness. I couldn’t understand why? I shouted – “what happeneddddd???? !!!”. Aary turns and points his finger to the bottom of the wardrobe.

I could not stop myself and started laughing. Another BIG sine wave swifted through my nerves, just like the rocket of the memory booster app in android world – It is her wardrobe. The boy is going to be crushed – I flew to the scene and saved him.

Instead of opening the bathroom doors, the boy opened the wardrobe door and emptied his bladder to it – full on to her cloths; I do not know how much it is going to cost me in the forms of wardrobe refilling, never mind.

Nocturnal Enuresis (pronounced: en-yuh-ree-sis) is natural for kids at this age as well as in the old age. There are various reasons medical science says as a cause for this; In simple android terms the following happens in the normal scenario – In a person with normal bladder control, the following conversation happens in the whatsup.

Whereas, in the case of nocturnal enuresis – the following happens

Simple diagnosis for the problem is train the brain; Brain needs to be awake for such emergency calls. All the children that suffers from this feel guilty in the morning because of this. Exploit this; Yes – teach them to train the brain; Just before going to sleep, force to empty the bladder (this almost every parent do). Apart from that ask them to sit the bed and tell them to imagine that they are waking up dry. Ask them how it feels when they wake up dry. This registers to the mind – and it works for most of the case;

Got this technique from internet – many from western world commented that it works well.

Started trying with my kids.. will update the comments with results.

Your Truly.

aary anu

Old wine in New bottle (another version of story - just for horror)

BIG Disclaimer - Ladies and Gents - I myself is a big fan of the Ramayana epic and a true devotee of the lord Ram. This is just for a fun - no offense intended to the epic nor to any characters of the same. Just go through the flow.

Other versions that i have read in the past:

S/W engineer version -(http://www.cs.cornell.edu/~kvikram/htmls/jokes/joke3.html)
American kid version – (http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Ramayana)

                  
                    (Scene 1 – Forest )

(Lush green forest  – and tar road going through the jungles – various sign boards. Sita, Ram and Laxman standing on the side of the road and looking to the other side)

(Sita takes a Coke from her X box and drinks)

RAM:  (looks around)  Beautiful !!

SITA: thanks

RAM:  (looks at Sita) – not to you , I am talking about the stalagmite formation of Luray caverns

LAXMAN: Man, its damn hot here – Bhabhi, any more coke left?

SITA: Sorry da..

(Tarzen sound effects)

LAXMAN: Looks like Tarzen is around. If he tries to mess with me, I am going kiss his A$$ out off.

SITA: (to Ram) Aaryaputhra, can I get a deer?

RAM: I can find one, but did you got other ingredients? Also how to cook it?

SITA: no, no, just to keep it as pet. When you guys go out, I will get bored, you know what I mean?

LAXMAN: I think Salman khan has eat all of them, look at the board – it says elephant crossing – not deer

RAM: Once we get back to the emirates, I will get you Doberman.

(A deer jumps across, Ram and Laxman runs behind the deer. Sita holds Laxman back)

SITA: Laxman?

LAXMAN: Yes, Bhabhi?

SITA: Your brother is going to take time. I know his stamina. I have been telling him do treadmill in the morning. He is hell bend on to Yoga – and sleeps in Savasana every day?

SITA: I am hungry. Can we get something?

LAXMAN: OK, You stay here; Let me if I can find McDonald’s?

SITA: Mc veggie for me – I am on diet

(Laxman takes a plastic yellow tape from his back pack and makes circle around Sita)

         LAXMAN: till the time I come back – do not cross this line.

SITA: OK, move on.

(Aeroplane landing sound effects; Ravana enters the scene; He has got a camcorder in his hand) 

RAVANA: I am the king of Srilanka; my name is Kumarathunga, Ravana Kumarathunga. Yeah, that my last name. I like you very much, If you can come with me – I can make you the queen of queens;

SITA: (with no interest) whatever?

RAVANA: I have got plane, Its Russian

SITA: (with no interest) yeah..

RAVANA: Lankstar mall, that belongs to me; 3 floors in Burj Khaleefa is mine. What do Ram has?

SITA: Word wide chain Ramada Inn is ours – we are on a holiday here.

RAVANA: Ramada Inn?

SITA: Yes that’s right

RAVANA: I left this hotel business long time back.

SITA: look man, whoever you are and whatever you have. I don’t know what you want. I am not interested in you, please get lost before my guys come back

(Ravana tries to cross the line, Sita takes the cell phone and tries to call)

SITA: Shit, its on roaming …

(Ravana then open his bag and takes some books out, titles of the book read ‘the Boko Haram way’, ‘Kid-napping by tell-a-tale.com’ and few others; chooses a yellow covered one with title reads ‘Kidnapping for dummies by Veerappan’ and turns the pages)

RAVANA: (whispering), rajkumar,  nakeeran, police line ..

(Ravana puts the book back and moves towards Sita and hold her hand)

(Burglar alarm sound – from behind; Ravana leaves Sita and looks back)

RAVANA: Hey, hey, who is that? Who is towing my vehicle?

(Jatayu enters)

JATAYU: I am Jatayu from Mexico, People call me Hadayu

RAVANA: Don’t you have IPL9, cricket commentary suits better dude

RAVANA: that’s Jadeja, I am Jatayu. I wont let you take Sita

(Ravana breaks Jatayu’s arrow and takes away Sita. Jatayu falls down, then Ram and Laxman enters and holds him)

JATAYU: (looks at sky) Push, push

LAXMAN: George W bush?

JATAYU: No no, Pushpak Viman. Ravana has kidnapped Sita and flew to Lanka

(Scene 2 – Another part of Jungle)

(Ram and Laxman is in deep thought of what to do next)

RAM: We need do something urgent bro?

LAXMAN: How about a Habeas Corpus petition?

RAM: It is going to take hell lot of time. Lets us call the MAN

LAXMAN: You mean Hanuman?

(Ram takes the phone dials and talks. Few minutes later loud sound Harley bike. Hanuman arrives in his Harley)

LAXMAN: We need your help?

HANUMAN: What the help (hell) are you talking about?

RAM: A freak from Srilanka has taken away my babe. We need to make a bridge between Lanka and Tamil Nadu

HANUMAN: Don’t worry about bridge. I have friend who can help in this.

HANUMAN: (looks out side ) Daai Thirudappa inga vaada thampi.

(Thirudappan enters In kalenger Karunanidhi style dress)

HANUMAN: He is a big PWD contractor for Kalenger.

THIRUDAPPAN: Vanakkam saar. Nan Thirupathi Thirudappan. Neega antha Chennai flyower pathirikangala?

LAXMAN: Hanuman? WTF, I don’t follow his bloody language?

HANUMAN: (to Thirudappan) Thampi avanga vanthu hindi.

THIRUDAPPAN: No problem. I am speaking to English. English theriyuma Unakku? You know English?

RAM: I need a bridge to Lanka, how soon you can make it?

THIRUDAPPAN: may be a fort night – 14 days. Pothuma?

LAXMAN: 2 weeks looks to be cool man.

HANUMAN: Thampi neega Pani thudange

(Scene 3 – Ravana’s palace)

(Ravana’s Palace. Sita sits on the floor and playing in her phone. Angry birds sound background. Kumbhakarna is sleeping in a bean bag. Ravana sits on a couch)

RAVANA: Dear, what all I have not done for you. You should marry me? At no cost Ram is going to make to this island.

(Sita nodes her face. By this time, one servant enters)

SERVANT: Your highness, Credit card company person has come. Asking for monthly instalment?

RAVANA: This is which one?

SERVANT: Sir, for the aero plane.

RAVANA: Ask him to sort it out with Vibheeshana

RAVANA (to Sita): So where were we?

SITA: I am very much hungry

RAVANA (to SERVANT): Hey, even I am hungry. Can you order a Pizza?

(Servant walks to land phone and dials)

SERVANT (to the phone): Hello, Is this Papa Hut? Is its not?

RAVANA: Then it might be Pizza Johns.

SERVANT: I need an extra-large, veg extravaganza with peperoni and macaroni.

SERVANT: Ham? Yes – even that is vegetarian right?

(By this time, Ram, Laxman and Hanuman enters)

RAM: Hi, I am Ram.

RAVANA: Hi Ram, How are you?

RAM: I am fine, how about you?

RAVANA: Pretty good, Its very hot up here. I am sweating like a Pig. Is it snowing outside?

RAM: Yes, little bit. We got stuck in heavy snow near to Rameshwaram.

RAVANA (to Servant): Who is there? Throw these folks outside my palace.

(Sita is still playing in her phone – Angry birds sound continues)

HANUMAN: Brother, it is good if we talk it out (shows his mussels).

RAVANA: OK, what is the ASK?

RAM: I need Sita?

RAVANA: for here OR take away?

RAM: what?

RAVANA: for here OR to go?

RAM: TO GO…

RAVANA: so, the lets have a deal. It is something like this

(Siren sound - Helicopter sound. FBI enters.One senior agent showing ID card to everyone including other fellow FBI officers. Another office hand-cuffs Ravana; Meanwhile Hanuman takes the ID card and pass to others)

FBI: We are from the FBI, Focana Bureau of .. sorry Federal Bureau of Investigation. Mr. Ravana, you are under arrest for kidnapping. You have the right to remain violent. I mean silent. Anything you say, will be used against your generation.

RAVANA: what?

FBI: We were searching for you for some years now. Apart from Sita we have rescued Miss Chandana Levi as well. Al-quida has already confessed in Istanbul that they have help you in stealing Kubera’s aeroplane.

RAVANA: you wont believe me. It is nor Kubera’s aircraft. I only helped him to steal it from Mr Yuri Karpov. Its soviet Russian engine.

FBI: Federal law will take its turn

(FBI takes Ravana away - Siren sound - Helicopter sound)

(Hanuman and Laxman flirt with Miss Chandana Levi)

(Pizza boy delivers the Pizza)

-----THE END-----